You might have a good reason to come up with a mean pick up line.
Or maybe you’re just looking for creative ways to get a drink thrown in your face or a kick in the balls. Either way, look no further, here’s a list of 65 rude and offensive pick up lines:
Mean Pick Up Lines
- I’m not saying you’re ugly, but you’re about 35 shots away from being my type.
- You’re really not hot enough to get away with being this boring.
- Sure, I might not be the prettiest person here, but fact is I’m the only one coming to talk to you.
- The more I drink, the prettier you get.
- I have an instrument that can measure the length of your throat.
- Are you a hoover? Cause you suck at life.
- Sorry, I don’t date outside my species.
- The fact that I’m missing some teeth only means that there’s more room for your tongue.
- I like your approach, now let’s see your departure.
- Is your a** jealous of the amount of s**t that just came out of your mouth?
- I could eat a bowl of alphabet soup and shit out a better line than that.
- The only way you’ll ever get laid is if you crawl up a chicken’s a** and wait.
- You’re proof that God has sense of humor.
- If I were to slap you, it would be considered animal abuse.
- Light travels faster than sound. That’s why you appeared bright until you spoke.
- I would rather mount a chainsaw than be with you.
- Are you a clock? Cause you’re ticking me off.
- Can I borrow your cell phone? I need to call animal control because I see a whale on the loose!
- You know, you’re not that bad looking for a fat-a**.
- Just call me your baby, cause I wanna be inside you for the next 9 months.
- What’s the difference between me and my couch? My couch pulls out.
- I just want to be friends… with your insides.
- Hey baby, you got any diseases? Want some?
Rude Pick Up Lines
Oops, someone’s gonna get hurt by these rude and crude pick up lines.
- On a scale from one to ten, how old are you?
- Did something bad happen to you or are you just naturally ugly?
- You don’t sweat much for a fat chick.
- You MUST have a nice personality.
- You’re ugly, but you do intrigue me…
- Do you like warm weather? Cause I’m gonna put my warm balls on your face whether you like it or not.
- I’ve had quite a bit to drink, and you’re finally beginning to look pretty good.
- You look gorgeous! … for your age.
- Your eyes are really cute. Oh, wait, nevermind, they’re just reflecting mine.
- You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.
- You owe me a drink, you’re so ugly I dropped mine when I saw you.
- Did you fall from heaven? Cause your face is pretty messed up!
- Are you a smoke detector? Cause you’re really loud and annoying.
- Baby, are you a cigarette? Cause I want to suck you all in and slowly kill myself.
- The last time I saw a body like yours, I was burying it in my basement.
- One swallow doesn’t make a summer. But it’s a great way to end a date.
- I used to go out with a homeless girl, like you. It was great. I could drop her off anywhere.
- I think you’re Wonder Woman. I mean, I wonder if you’re really a woman.
- Why don’t you slip into something more comfortable, like a coma?
Offensive Pick Up Lines: still not enough?
A couple more insulting pick up lines:
- I’ve seen better legs on a coffee table.
- It’s a dirty job but someone’s got to do you.
- If you were twice as smart, you’d still be stupid.
- You are so ugly, even Hello Kitty said goodbye to you.
- Baby, your birth certificate is really just an apology from the condom factory.
- Do you have to leave so soon? I was just going to poison your drink.
- Every person has the right to be ugly, but you have abused that privilege.
- So, do you still love nature, regardless of what it did to you?
- Baby, some day you will finally find yourself and wish you hadn’t!
- Sorry, I wasn’t paying attention, what did you say? I was just visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.
- You’re that ugly that if I could do myself, I wouldn’t need you.
- You’ve only got 3 brain cells left and they’re all fighting for attention.
- The smartest thing to ever come out of your mouth is going to be my D.
- Sorry hun, I’d make fun of you but I don’t think you’d understand it.
- You’re one load your mum should have swallowed!
- Roses are red, violets are blue, God made me pretty … but what the hell happened to you?!
- How many times do I have to flush to get rid of you?
- Wanna know why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from you.
- Let me guess: you’re just mad because your hair is straighter than you are, right?
- Baby, calling you stupid would be an insult to stupid people.
- My middle finger gets a boner when I think of you.
- You must have been born on a highway because that’s where most accidents happen.
- You’re as bright as Alaska in December.
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