65 Mean Pick Up Lines

You might have a good reason to come up with a mean pick up line.

Or maybe you’re just looking for creative ways to get a drink thrown in your face or a kick in the balls. Either way, look no further, here’s a list of 65 rude and offensive pick up lines:

Mean Pick Up Lines

  1. I’m not saying you’re ugly, but you’re about 35 shots away from being my type.
  2. You’re really not hot enough to get away with being this boring.
  3. Sure, I might not be the prettiest person here, but fact is I’m the only one coming to talk to you.
  4. The more I drink, the prettier you get.
  5. I have an instrument that can measure the length of your throat.
  6. Are you a hoover? Cause you suck at life.
  7. Sorry, I don’t date outside my species.
  8. The fact that I’m missing some teeth only means that there’s more room for your tongue.
  9. I like your approach, now let’s see your departure.
  10. Is your a** jealous of the amount of s**t that just came out of your mouth?
  11. I could eat a bowl of alphabet soup and shit out a better line than that.
  12. The only way you’ll ever get laid is if you crawl up a chicken’s a** and wait.
  13. You’re proof that God has sense of humor.
  14. If I were to slap you, it would be considered animal abuse.
  15. Light travels faster than sound. That’s why you appeared bright until you spoke.
  16. I would rather mount a chainsaw than be with you.
  17. Are you a clock? Cause you’re ticking me off.
  18. Can I borrow your cell phone? I need to call animal controlĀ because I see a whale on the loose!
  19. You know, you’re not that bad looking for a fat-a**.
  20. Just call me your baby, cause I wanna be inside you for the next 9 months.
  21. What’s the difference between me and my couch? My couch pulls out.
  22. I just want to be friends… with your insides.
  23. Hey baby, you got any diseases? Want some?

Rude Pick Up Lines

Oops, someone’s gonna get hurt by these rude and crude pick up lines.

  1. On a scale from one to ten, how old are you?
  2. Did something bad happen to you or are you just naturally ugly?
  3. You don’t sweat much for a fat chick.
  4. You MUST have a nice personality.
  5. You’re ugly, but you do intrigue me…
  6. Do you like warm weather? Cause I’m gonna put my warm balls on your face whether you like it or not.
  7. I’ve had quite a bit to drink, and you’re finally beginning to look pretty good.
  8. You look gorgeous! … for your age.
  9. Your eyes are really cute. Oh, wait, nevermind, they’re just reflecting mine.
  10. You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.
  11. You owe me a drink, you’re so ugly I dropped mine when I saw you.
  12. Did you fall from heaven? Cause your face is pretty messed up!
  13. Are you a smoke detector? Cause you’re really loud and annoying.
  14. Baby, are you a cigarette? Cause I want to suck you all in and slowly kill myself.
  15. The last time I saw a body like yours, I was burying it in my basement.
  16. One swallow doesn’t make a summer. But it’s a great way to end a date.
  17. I used to go out with a homeless girl, like you. It was great. I could drop her off anywhere.
  18. I think you’re Wonder Woman. I mean, I wonder if you’re really a woman.
  19. Why don’t you slip into something more comfortable, like a coma?

Offensive Pick Up Lines: still not enough?

A couple more insulting pick up lines:

  1. I’ve seen better legs on a coffee table.
  2. It’s a dirty job but someone’s got to do you.
  3. If you were twice as smart, you’d still be stupid.
  4. You are so ugly, even Hello Kitty said goodbye to you.
  5. Baby, your birth certificate is really just an apology from the condom factory.
  6. Do you have to leave so soon? I was just going to poison your drink.
  7. Every person has the right to be ugly, but you have abused that privilege.
  8. So, do you still love nature, regardless of what it did to you?
  9. Baby, some day you will finally find yourself and wish you hadn’t!
  10. Sorry, I wasn’t paying attention, what did you say? I was just visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.
  11. You’re that ugly that if I could do myself, I wouldn’t need you.
  12. You’ve only got 3 brain cells left and they’re all fighting for attention.
  13. The smartest thing to ever come out of your mouth is going to be my D.
  14. Sorry hun, I’d make fun of you but I don’t think you’d understand it.
  15. You’re one load your mum should have swallowed!
  16. Roses are red, violets are blue, God made me pretty … but what the hell happened to you?!
  17. How many times do I have to flush to get rid of you?
  18. Wanna know why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from you.
  19. Let me guess: you’re just mad because your hair is straighter than you are, right?
  20. Baby, calling you stupid would be an insult to stupid people.
  21. My middle finger gets a boner when I think of you.
  22. You must have been born on a highway because that’s where most accidents happen.
  23. You’re as bright as Alaska in December.

If you liked this article, you might also enjoy:

Pick Up Lines for Girls

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